That La Kid

wishin' an' hopin'!

20 weeks

on May 20, 2012

As of today, baby is a banana.  It’s weird to go from mango to banana.  One week, I think we go from, like, acorn squash to cucumber.  The round plump to long and skinny transitions weird me out on the food chart.  I imagine it being round and plump all the time.

Twenty weeks preggo and I’m still at the weight I was when I started.  THANK GOD.  I am obese, so I shouldn’t put on too much.  I think the stats about diet soda are true.  People who drink diet soda tend to weigh more than people who drink regular soda.  It’s true with me.  I know, I know… I am supposed to cut out caffeine.   Actually, I can safely have up to 200 mg of caffeine per day.  I tend to have two Dr. Peppers a day, which is about 70 mg.  I’m sure there is some caffeine in the other stuff I’m taking in (chocolate?) but I think I am safely under the limit.  So, yeah… 20 weeks, and no weight gain.  Feelin’ good.

I am, however, starting to see a bit of a bump.  My sisters tell me it looks WAY different than Mr. Nasty, way cuter.  I got a lot of attention on Mother’s Day, and I don’t really know what to do with that.  For example, the manager at Olive Garden gave all the moms at our table a $10 off coupon and told me to come back and tell her when I knew what we were having.  I was so shy and awkward.  She said,”is it your first?”  I said, “Yes.”  “How are you feeling?”  “Terrified.”

I don’t know how to make myself happy and excited about it, but I suspect it has to do with shopping.  I feel like if I could get a crib, and a dresser, and really start to set up for this kid, then I’d feel better about the whole deal.  Right now I am just bringing another person into my mess.  There’s no sense in buying a crib or assembling a dresser now, when we are moving in (hopefully less than) 2 months.  I have a lot of anxiety about the kind of mom I’m going to be.  Everyone thinks I’ll be awesome.  Everyone but me.  I’ve got a good thing going with my husband.  We went to the Nationwide race last year just because we had the free tickets.  How can we do that with a baby?  We have to get a sitter… and blah, blah, blah.  Our free tickets and night out costs us $30.  We laugh and play and have so much fun when it’s just the two of us.  I don’t want to give that up.  On the other hand, I don’t know why I think things will change so drastically when we add a third to our party.  It’ll just be one more really cool thing we’re experiencing together.

Plus, WE TRIED FOR SOOOOOO LOOOONG!!!  So, what?  Like, now that we’ve made it I’m not sure if I want to go through with it?  Should have thought of that in January.

Ah, January.  Mr. Nasty is GONE.  That huge open cut down my gut is HEALED.  All my parts WORK.  Just thinking about that gets me excited about this whole baby deal.  Three years, nothing.  Cyst removed, FIRST TRY!  In January, we wanted it so bad, and tried so hard.  🙂  Our families are THRILLED.  It’s going to be born in the Year of the Dragon!

But yeah, I have mixed emotions.

***Just realized, says cantaloupe, not banana.***

2 responses to “20 weeks

  1. Erin says:

    I can relate to the mixed emotions, especially when you are stressed about all that’s left to do and all that will change about your already pretty awesome life. But so far for us, it has been true what “they” say. Babies magnify your relationship – if there are problems, they get bigger, but if things are awesome – they get awesomer! You’re going to love seeing Tom as a dad, it will make you prefer your nights at home to those impromptu date nights. (although I’m not sure I should use that term for Nationwide racing) 😉

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